Are you in a relationship with a girl and wondering how to maintain control? Every man knows that he must lead but what exactly does that mean? How does a man maintain the right frame within his relationship?
The mainstream media often shames men for taking control of their relationships. Meanwhile, some pick-up artists stress constantly being in control.
A lot of men fall on the spectrum of being too passive and thus failing to lead within their relationships. Other men become so entranced by the concept of “maintaining frame” that they feel the need to be in control of everything.
The art of maintaining control of your woman is subtle.
You must lead by being in charge of where you guys go and what you guys do. Take initiative and be the one to suggest things. Also be dominant sexually. Although many women don’t admit it, they want you to be “daddy” so that they can relax and let go.
A feminine woman surrenders to her man knowing that wherever he takes her, she will have fun and be fulfilled. Femininity has to do with surrender and yielding which is in and of itself a strength.
Masculine energy is more about breaking through barriers, coolness under pressure,
being grounded in purpose, and positive dominance.
Women want to be led by a strong masculine man who is worthy of following. They don’t want to be led by some pussy who always puts her desires first forcing her into a masculine/leadership role. Remember: women want to surrender.
Due to feminism, pussified men, and other aspects of modern society, women are more masculine than ever before. Thus, they often feel the need to take control in relationships.
Women also test men by trying to assert themselves and take charge in order to see if the man responds in a masculine way or if he gives control to the woman. This is just a way to see if a man is “the real thing” or a fraud.
Ultimately, women WANT to lose control to a strong a man. But they will poke weak men in order to determine their worthiness. This is often referred to as a shit-test.
Now that you know this, you may start to become hyper-aware of the subtle dynamics that occur within a relationship.
This hyper-awareness may lead you to become overly controlling. This can happen in the short term or in the long term if you’re not careful.
Being overly controlling is when you try to control little/irrelevant things in a girl’s behavior. It’s when you try controlling things that have little to no impact on the general direction/dynamic of the relationship.
Overly controlling behavior is needy, reactive and often a sign of insecurity. (She’s acting this way because I’m not worthy). Men who exhibit this type of behavior often end up offended when a girl doesn’t follow his orders.
It’s unrealistic to be 100% in control of your woman all the time no matter how alpha you may be. Failing to understand this is failing to understand that women are their own entities with their own personality traits, quirks, likes/dislikes, beliefs and mindsets.
Control the overall direction of the relationship and treat petty acts of insubordination on her end as laughable and insignificant.
Being unreactive to your woman’s behavior (as long as it’s petty) is a highly attractive trait. It is a reflection of you being secure within your masculine role. Being a needy dictator is what insecure and emotionally unstable men do.
Women want to be led but only if you are worthy. Take ownership of that role and let go of your fear to lead. Once you are successfully leading the overall direction of the relationship, let go of petty acts of insubordination of her part. As long as you are wearing the pants and you remain unreactive/grounded you will exude the alpha/masculine presence that women love. Control your woman but remember that there are boundaries.