10 Ways To Win The War On Your Need For Instant Gratification

“The difference between peak performance and poor performance is not intelligence or ability; most often it’s the state that your mind and body is in.”  —Tony Robbins

Not long ago, I started to seriously study Tony Robbins. His track record is second to none as nobody has made a bigger impact in the self-development industry.

The more I study Tony Robbins, the more I understand the importance of your state.

I learned that your state is influenced by “The Triad” which consists of 3 things:

#1 Physiology

How are you using your body? How you use your body influences how you feel. Are you slumped over? Are your facial muscles tense? Are you breathing shallowly? All of these things impact your state…

Science shows that your body language definitely influences your moods. If you’re sitting at a computer desk for hours on end and barely moving, don’t be surprised if you feel stagnant and lethargic after.

#2 Language

Language refers to your inner dialogue. And inner dialogue ALWAYS consists of questions. What questions are you asking yourself? If you’re like most people, you are asking yourself questions like “Why does this always happen to me?” or “When will I get a break?” or “She can’t possibly like me, can she?”.

Your brain is like a computer—you will get an answer for every question you ask…

So make sure you’re asking powerful questions like:

What do I want?

Why do I want it?

How am I going to get it?

How can I make this better?

#3 Focus & Beliefs

Focus equals reality to the individual even though it’s not reality in actuality. Another way to put it is: What you focus on is what you feel whether if it’s true or not.

So change your focus. Find something to be grateful for. Focus on something you’re proud or excited about in your life. What’s wrong is always available but so is what’s right. Your job is to focus on what’s right.

Stop Seeking Instant Gratification to Change Your State

When most people feel pain, they tend to seek out ways to comfort themselves. The problem is that most of the things people do to comfort themselves only make things worse in the long run. Eating candy, chips or ice cream feel good for a few minutes but the dopamine rush quickly goes away. It’s the same thing with activities like porn, drugs, video-games, and mindless surfing on the internet. These are all just fleeting pleasures that last for a few minutes but don’t leave you feeling empowered.

Whether you’re tired, need a break, in a bad mood, frustrated, uncomfortable, in pain, etc. I challenge you to raise your standard for how you react in these situations. I challenge you to abandon your old habits of instant gratification which admittedly do bring immediate and sure reward. And I invite you to replace these habits with the ones below or similar ones if you can think of any.

The sacrifice you will have to make:

By abandoning disempowering habits of comfort, you will have to let go of your need for the immediate and sure reward that instant gratification offers.

Taking on this new path is simple but not easy.

When times get tough and you start feening for comfort and pleasure, you will need to say NO and instead discipline your reaction. You will need to discipline your reaction to pain by choosing EMPOWERING ways to get back into state.

This will NOT always be very comfortable but I can guarantee you one thing and this is it: You will ALWAYS be happier for it in the near future. PERIOD.

In order to grow you must raise your standards! React to pain in the same disempowering ways as before and you will be forever weak. However, choose your reactions to pain by engaging in empowering activities and you will be miles ahead of most on the journey to self-mastery and fulfillment.  

10 Ways to Change Your State

#1 Warrior Breathing Drill

Warriors, monks, and masters of all times and ages have known the importance of breathing. Breathing is a sure-fire way to change your physiology. Remember physiology is one of the 3 elements when it comes to your state.

Controlled breathing has been scientifically proven to lower your heart rate, calm your nervous system, decrease stress, and increase your focus/concentration.

If you’re feeling agitated or uncomfortable breathing will definitely help you. O

#2 Run.

Another way to change your physiology is by walking or jogging. If your state is going to shit, pop in some headphones and go for a walk or jog around the neighborhood. Listen to an empowering audiobook or motivational video as you do so. The audio will help direct your focus and language.

This is definitely a powerful way to relax and change your state only to come out feeling better than ever!

#3 Massive Vision/Purpose + Keep It Handy

“He who has a why can bear almost any how” – Friedrich Nietzsche

Staying disciplined can feel a bit tough at times. However, if you have a strong enough vision and purpose then you can easily push through the pain.

I actually have my vision and purpose in writing and easily accessible through my phone at all times. I revisit my vision and purpose almost daily. This step is crucial if you want to maintain self-discipline in the long run. You need to have a list of clear and compelling reasons for what it is you’re after and why you’re after it.

Having these written out will help you change your state from “I hate doing this meaningless crap” to “This is my purpose, I MUST do this”.

#4 Take a Cat Nap

Sometimes I’m in a stupid state and my thinking is all fuzzy. If I’m not careful, a stupid state will have me making stupid decisions.

Often times, I get into stupid states when I’m sleep deprived or mentally fatigued. I have found that taking a quick nap can make a world of difference. There have been times when I took a quick nap and my thinking about a situation completely changed.

Naps are good for you. They increase cognition, memory and even testosterone. Naps are a great activity to do when you’re not feeling 100%.

#5 Call Your Coach or a Powerful & Positive Friend

If you have an accountability partner or coach, giving them a call and telling them what’s going on can definitely help. Sometimes all it takes is hearing their voice and you feel up and motivated.

Other times, it helps to explain the situation and come up with a quick plan of action you can take. Either way, both options change your pattern of focus and language.

Not everyone has a powerful and positive friend to rely on, I was certainly in that boat. Hiring a coach was a GAME-CHANGER for me. Did you know I provide accountability and strategy coaching for men now? Book a free call with me here to see if you qualify!

#6 Airplane Mode + Nature

I’m lucky because I work from home and happen to live in a place where there is plenty of nature and where I can easily go the backyard and unplug. I do this quite frequently especially if I’m not particularly motivated or fond of the task at hand.

Doing a quick reset in nature without mindlessly surfing the web or social media calms me down and fills me with a sense of wholeness. This is a great way to take a break and feel happy and motivated to get back to work.

#7 Motivational Video Drill

I found that listening to motivational videos definitely helps change your focus and language patterns. When i’m not feeling empowered, I sometimes stop what I’m doing, pop in some headphones and just listen to a few motivational videos. I find that the content drowns out some if not most of the disempowering language patterns and beliefs I was entertaining beforehand .

If you combine motivational videos with movement such as yoga, walking or running— you’ll feel even better. You’re basically getting your body and mind in motion. And motion creates emotion.

#8  Sincere Gratitude

Gratitude immediately changes your focus pattern if you do it with enthusiasm and sincerity. Tony Robbins always says “What’s wrong is always available and so is what’s right”.

A lot of us have “first world problems” AKA problems that have nothing to do with life or death. The truth of the matter is that most of us take our lives for granted and we would be so much happier if we simply realized the fact that we’re blessed.

Every single day, I am VERY thankful to be a citizen of the United States of America. It’s not a perfect country but it’s the only one that has this much freedom and opportunity.

When I’m not feeling happy, I verbalize 3 things I’m grateful for and say them out loud! I don’t just mutter these things to myself in an unenthusiastic tone. This helps keep things in perspective when my state takes a dip.

Ex: Tony Robbins once had a celebrity client who had everything going for her under the sun: Fame, good looks, romance, adventure, etc… Yet this celebrity was feeling depressed.

Tony Robbins cured her by giving her one sentence that he made her repeat to herself during times of so called depression: “Thank God I’m not a cockroach in Bulgaria!”.

#9 Mom Might Need Help With The Dishes

If you’re feeling a bit off balance, try this: Stop being so focused on yourself and your own problems and go help someone else. Go help your mom wash the dishes or go help your dad with the lawn. Go help your son with his homework.

The point is to go somewhere and take the focus off of yourself for a change. Being focused on someone else will change your pattern of focus, language and physiology which are all elements of your state!

#10 Reward Yourself with Instant Gratification

Caution!!! There’s a reason I saved this for last. INstant gratification through junk food, entertainment and other sources can be used but only with MASSIVE discipline.

If it’s Monday morning and you haven’t done any work on your body, mind or business…chances are you don’t deserve cookies right now. However, if it’s Sunday evening and you just spent the whole week investing growing in every way…then go ahead and have that bowl of ice-cream and some Cheetos.

But this step must be done with massive self-discipline and must be taken seriously. Otherwise, you’ll be like most people who will eventually ruin their lives due to their addiction to comfort and leisure.

Stay Strong,

Maximillion Giamarco


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Maximillian Giamarco

Entrepreneur, coach, and author. Spartan Ownership is centered on providing groundbreaking content, products, and services tailored to improving men's lives. Main areas of focus include masculine lifestyle design, character development, self-discipline, MMA, women, mind and body optimization, and more!

Reader Interactions


  1. Kelly says

    I find myself bouncing from moments of impeccability and weakness my own negitive behavior. It seem that their is a trap door always waiting for the easy way out. Whenever I feel that I am on the cusp of my true purpose, something impedes and sets me back. I realize that the effort for either outcome requires the same energy, and yet I find myself sometimes falling for the negative. Impeccablity, I realize is the one thing that no power can take from you. Whether in success or failure, to follow the path of impeccability is the only alternative to freedom. Therein lies the rub. It is clear that one problem that clings to me is taking responsibility for my actions.


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